On my way

I am currently in Ethiopia with a layover and will soon be heading to Dar es Salaam- the New York City of Tanzania-to start my second Dramatic Adventure. Last year, I went to Eastern Europe, so I know Eastern Africa will be quite a different experience. I am grateful to have finally landed safely in the Motherland although I can’t actually see much just yet. My brain is racing with nerves and excitement all at once…Am I strong enough? Confident enough? Consistent enough? Mature enough? Smart enough? Talented enough? Kind enough? ¬†Am I anticipating too much? Thinking too much? Will I be too much? Will I be too little? Will they expect too much? My stomach is reacting to my brain like a bubbling volcano- partly from the gas I get when I’m anxious and partly from the coffee and wine I know I shouldn’t be drinking because of my silent re-flux. A little nausea. A little motion sickness. And a lot of different ways I learned to contort my body in order to ease my nervous itching and get at least a little more sleep than I got the night before. My brain is racing and I’m holding my pee because I don’t want to have to ninja over the man sitting in the aisle seat again. I pee. I sit back down. Why do I still feel like I have to pee? Getting a UTI would totally ruin my trip right before it started. My heart feels tender, like the head of a baby infant. A baby infant wales on the airplane for a moment but that is the least of my discomfort. To uplift my soul, I read various inspirational quotes and think of previous memories to remind me of my worth, of my privilege to be able to travel and pursue my passion, to follow my path, to slowly but surely grasp my dream. Last year was a hell of a trip, but this too will be an experience of a lifetime.

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